Saturday, October 16, 2010

not worth it .

Well Hello2 dear bloggie. I've just noticed that this humble blog of mine is filled with nonsense and crappy reviews about movies. Seriously.. what was wrong with me ? Most prolly I didn't have a single clue on what to write about, so I just basically ramble and talk about all these stupid things. In other words to escape reality, hence I prefer to talk about other things that might.. I REPEAT .. might distract me. The thing that I fear most about this blog is that it will end up dead and dull just like yours truly.haha.

It has been almost 3 months since I last blogged. Many things happen along the way that I feel like not sharing about and was determined not to bitch about it. Somehow I would be like a coward never confronting people about the thing that pisses me off but then just bitching about in the blog. But then again most people choose to throw all of their bottled emotions that they just can't stand keeping it all inside and chose the easiest way. Yes the answer is either your blog,twitter,tumblr and of course your facebook status.

There's no point of doing all of this if those certain people still can't open their eyes to see what they're doing and thinking that it is A-OK to crush you into small tiny little pieces until you can't find back the missing pieces that is gone and try to stand once more and say hey I'm okay ! :) yeah u see. It is totally weird how people love putting in a double meaning in every sentence,heck in every conversation that they make. It is just their own way to express themselves plus they won't be so straightforward and It's a fact people don't like the ugly truth. They would rather choose to listen to lies than the truth. Sometimes when people can't stand it anymore they tend to exaggerate. This is because exaggeration is truth that has lost it's temper.

The funniest thing that happens to someone every time they think that they're going to do just fine. But then wham bham it gets sorta worse. So how do you handle it ? Let me see. First act like ever thing is okay and surely going to be better, Secondly keep yourself busy so that you won't feel like doing anything stupid like for instance strangling someone ? or hit them with a pillow ? Wow.haha. That is totally not what I had in mind it just came out of the blue. Hitting with a pillow. I mean like Say Waaaaaaaaaaat ? So kindergarden-ish/sleepover party kind of thing. I don't want to sound too violent. Ummm...okay I don't really have a third one. Sorry ran out of ideas.

I was wondering whether there are people out there who actually run around acting like their alter ego. Woah that will be super scary. If I were to do that I guess I would be friendless :/ But it's okay I don't need anyone right, I'm all alright on my own. Again a funny fact when people keep asking you, Are you okay ? Well clearly when people ask that kind of question they would surely have a rather sketchy idea that the particular person that they're asking is doing ummm how shall I say this .. not so good. . People don't need that much sympathy,turn them into a charity case and slowly killing them in the inside.

Most prolly they're really concern and that's a really good thing. Those people who are not doing so ok will feel slightly better than someone care even when they show the slightest hint. At least you know and not to keep burdening yourself with questions that keeps popping on and on till you feel like bursting into flames,kicking and screaming asking WHY.WHY.WHY

Imagine that people ? Quite a scary and disturbing image I must say. Again as easy as this sound but then It is not that easy to do is to just let go. Even if you don't let go there's still going to be that empty hole that can never be filled. It will be left abandoned. It will always be static. Never moving forwards nor backwards. It hurts,nevertheless eventually you'll live. Every time something drifts apart most people would cling on to the memories that they like of the person and try to remember it,even though the time that they had spent was just a short period time.As the moment passes you will realize If they don't need you anymore, you won't need them back. It is easier to move forward if you don't let others hold you back.

But don't ever lie to yourself. If you miss them just miss them,send some light to them and when the moment is gone, try not to be too sad about it. Take a deep breath and remember that you'll be alright. Every thing happens for a reason and we can never really know what the future might bring us. We cannot force ourselves into doing something that we don't want let alone becoming someone else. I'm sorry if I've hurt you along the way without even realizing it.

Albert Camus once wrote that, "Blessed are the hearts that can be bend. They shall never be broken". But there's where I wonder if there's no breaking that means there's no healing from the wounds. And If there's no healing then there's no learning. And if there's no learning then there's no struggle. But of course the struggle is part of life. And again I shall ask, So must all hearts be broken ? I'll let you answer that yourself . Till then my dear bloggie ;) As said by Ketut Liyer from the movie Eat.Pray.Love,See You Later, Alligator ! :P

0 comments: